What the hell, vote Tarbell?

Dear fellow tax hikers, the race for Hamilton County Commissioner has become even more crowded and confusing than it was before.  A few days ago we talked about The Ghostbuster Sean Feeney.  Now we're talking about Jim Tarbell. 

Tarbell, you see, is so upset that Hamilton County citizens won't get to pay higher taxes for Cincinnati-owned Music Hall that he's decided to run as a write-in candidate.  Four years ago Tarbell ran as the Democratic candidate, only to get crushed by our enemy Chris Monzel 56-44%. 

This puts us in a quandary.  We endorsed Taxin' Tarbell in his losing 2010 campaign.  But a few days ago we endorsed The Ghostbuster for this race.  

We need feedback from you, our loyal readers.  Which of our endorsed candidates do we stand behind? 

1) The streetcar supporter that wants to raise taxes for Music Hall who is on the ballot?
or
2) The streetcar supporter that wants to raise taxes for Music Hall who isn't on the ballot?

Or do we endorse both of these pro-streetcar tax hikers?  Write us with your thoughts. 

Ghostbuster for Hamilton County Commissioner

Dear fellow tax hikers, our candidate for Hamilton County Commissioner, Democrat Sean Feeney, has a plan to defeat incumbent Commissioner Chris Monzel.  And it involves reaching out to everyone - especially the Paranormal-American community.   

Yes, it was discovered today that Feeney is a former paranormal investigator.  He specialized in investigating UFO's and ghosts, and was so dedicated to the cause that he co-authored an ethics guide into paranormal investigations.

Has Chris Monzel ever co-authored a paranormal ethics guide?   

What do you do when Hamilton County Commissioners won't raise taxes as high as you want?  What do you do when you hate Monzel as much as we do and can never defeat him?  What do you do about all these injustices?  Who you gonna call? 

GHOSTBUSTERS! 

This story hits home.  One of my spouses was kidnapped in 2012 by space aliens.  Fortunately these were fun aliens instead of the evil ones.  They spent his month of captivity pulling pranks and telling jokes before returning him safely back to Earth. 

This diversity of experience will be enormously helpful to the Feeney campaign.  He won't beat Monzel with just Hamilton County voters.  But once Feeney gets votes from ghosts, dead people, and aliens from outer space he will be victorious. 

We leave you with the theme song for the Feeney campaign.

Sean Feeney bashes "Catholic Monzel"

Dear fellow tax hikers, you already know that we hate nearly everything about conservative Republican Chris Monzel.  That includes his Catholic religion.  We are so happy to learn that Monzel has an opponent named Sean Feeney, and that Feeney hates Catholics too. 

There is nothing worse than a Catholic who is pro-life and fiscally conservative.  We applaud Sean Feeney for calling out Catholic Monzel for his beliefs.  That's the kind of guy we want representing Hamilton County citizens, or at least the non-Catholic ones.

Monzel honored by local GOP

Dear fellow tax hikers, we have been very angry this weekend (as we usually are).  As if this month hasn't been bad enough for our movement, we suffered another indignity Friday night when the Hamilton County Republican Party honored our enemy Chris Monzel as their Elected Official of the Year. 

We tax hikers can't imagine anyone less deserving.  Monzel has consistently opposed higher taxes - even opposing the Democratic/Leis Sales Tax hike that we strongly backed.  He opposed sending more taxpayer money to the Freedom Center, and has always opposed our beloved streetcar. 

Monzel is up for re-election this year, and if he had an opponent we would have already endorsed her. 

We condemn the Hamilton County GOP for honoring such a terrible official.  After we progressive tax hikers had to suffer through the victories of Jonathan Dever and Tom Brinkman earlier this month, the party should have tended to our hurt feelings by giving this award to a great tax-and-spender.  A few conservatives may have rigged this award for their buddy Monzel, but we will continue to oppose his efforts to stop tax increases and our streetcar. 

OKI Streetcar funding in danger

Dear fellow tax hikers, we strongly condemn Hamilton County Commissioners Chris Monzel and Greg Hartmann for urging the Ohio-Kentucky-Indiana Regional Council of Governments (OKI) to rescind the $4 million they previously allocated for the Cincinnati Streetcar.  They believe the money should be redirected to projects that serve more residents.  We disagree.

So what if the streetcar route has been shortened by over 2 miles?  So what if the project has already experienced significant cost overruns?  So what if the start date has been pushed back many years?  So what if the projected economic benefits have been significantly reduced before track construction has even started?  This streetcar should be built, no matter how much it costs. 

We completely sympathize with streetcar supporters who happily solicit and/or take money from Hamilton County, the State of Ohio, and the federal government, while telling all non-city residents to shut up about the streetcar.  If you don't live in Cincinnati you have no right to comment on the city's streetcar, but we'll happily make you pay for it. 

We stand behind the streetcar 100%.  We don't care how much it costs, and we know that Mark Mallory, Roxanne Qualls, and the other streetcar supporters on Council agree.  We especially support requiring outsiders to pay for the project and we condemn Commissioners Monzel and Hartmann for trying to redirect these funds. 

Commissioners kill Museum Center tax hike

Dear fellow tax hikers, we are extremely angry tonight after reading the Hamilton County Commissioners have unanimously rejected the Museum Center's demand for a $150 million property tax increase to renovate the Union Terminal building.  This is appalling.  If the Museum wants $150 million, they should get it no questions asked.  It is the Commissioners' duty to raise taxes on command.

Ignore the fact that the building is owned by the City of Cincinnati.  They don't have the money to fix their own buildings because they would rather spend their Capital funds to build a streetcar.  You suburbanites need to pay higher taxes to maintain Cincinnati's buildings so that white urban hipsters can have themselves a streetcar! 

We are extremely disappointed in Commissioners Greg Hartmann and Todd Portune for their decision.  We would be disappointed in that miser Monzel, but we already knew he was a bum.  This guy has viciously opposed every part of our tax-and-spend agenda.  From opposing our $777 million Sales Tax increase, to opposing the Light Rail Sales Tax hike, to opposing more stadium taxes, to opposing a modest Trash Tax, and much more, Monzel has been one of our biggest enemies. 

Commissioner Hartmann disappoints us.  We thought he turned a corner over these past few years and became one of us.  Why wouldn't he want to raise taxes on all Hamilton County property owners to help Cincinnati afford their streetcar?  We are so upset at Hartmann, that effective immediately we have stripped him of the prestigious "Tax Hike Hartmann" nickname that we once awarded him.  He will not get it back until he raises some serious taxes around here. 

We are also very disappointed in Commissioner Portune.  We remember the days when he was our ally, but over the past 2 years he has turned into one of those fiscal conservatives!   Who could have guessed that Todd Portune, in the same 12 months, would say no higher stadium taxes, say no to subsidizing the streetcar, and say no to taxing Hamilton County residents to help maintain a Cincinnati building?  Todd needs to look in a mirror and remind himself the true meaning of Mustache Power. 

We encourage all you tax hikers to contact the Commissioners to let them know of your disappointment.  Tell them they should raise taxes anytime one of Cincinnati's buildings needs work.  Tell them all Hamilton County residents should pay higher taxes to ensure that Cincinnati has the money to build their streetcar.  We are going to continue our fight to raise county property taxes for this streetcar, I mean the building that hosts The Museum Center.  Tax us more!

Is Connie Pillich a racist?

Dear fellow tax hikers, we have received some very interesting information about State Representative Connie Pillich and her real views about minorities.  In recent weeks the State House took up discussion on HB 408, legislation which would add two suburban voices to the 5-person CMHA Board.  Our awful Hamilton County Commissioner Chris Monzel traveled to Columbus to testify in favor it, which led to an exchange with Rep. Pillich.

According to the Gongwer news review of the testimony, Pillich asked Monzel if one of the concerns behind this legislation is the possibility of black people moving into predominantly white townships.

Rep. Connie Pillich (D-Montgomery) asked whether another concern involved issues with the potential for predominantly black CHMA residents moving into predominantly white townships.

Our sources tell us Pillich's questions were even more confrontational than reported by that news service.  They tell us Pillich asked Monzel if his real goal isn't to stop black people from moving out into the suburbs. 

Is Connie Pillich suggesting that black people can't move out of "the city" without a government program to do it for them?  Is she saying black citizens are incapable of locating themselves into their chosen neighborhood? 

Let's take a look at the record of these two individuals when it comes to their willingness to live near black people.  Pillich lives in the city of Montgomery.  According to the 2010 Census, Montgomery is 2.7% black.  For most of the past 15 years, Monzel has lived in Cincinnati, which is 44.8% black.  Should we ask our numbers crew to tell us which of these two has a problem living near black people and which one doesn't? 

We don't believe Pillich is a racist.  We believe she loves minorities, when they show up to the polls and vote for her.  She just doesn't want "those people" living near her.  That's our progressive white liberal Connie Pillich.

Hartmann's Property Tax Hike Fails

Dear fellow tax hikers, we are extremely mad at Hamilton County Commissioners Chris Monzel and Todd Portune for voting to keep their promise to the voters by maintaining the Property Tax Rollback.  We are disgusted that they refused to support the fantastic property tax increase championed by Commissioner Greg Hartmann.  Because of this awful 2-1 vote, Hamilton County homeowners will not be paying higher taxes for the Bengals and Reds stadiums. 

This is a terrible day for the tax-hiking movement.  It was a great chance to raise taxes.  Tax Hike Hartmann knows higher property taxes are needed to ensure Mike Brown and the Bengals are provided everything they want.  Tax Hike Hartmann knows our property taxes are too low and must be raised.  Tax Hike Hartmann knows that the Property Tax Rollback was a promise made to be broken. 

We at Republicans for Higher Taxes are officially withdrawing our long-standing support for Portune.  He has betrayed our movement time and time again this year by refusing to supporting higher property taxes for the stadiums and museums, supporting a stadium ticket fee so that those who use the stadiums pay for them, and opposing new gifts to Mike Brown.  Portune no longer understands that the taxpayers should always come last. 

We also call on our beloved Republican Chairman Alex Triantafilou to throw Monzel out of the Republican Party.  We're the party of higher taxes and Monzel isn't respecting this fact!  He was ordered to obey Tax Hike Hartmann and refused, just as he disobeyed Simon Leis in 2007 by opposing the Leis Sales Tax increase. 

We applaud Tax Hike Hartmann for his fantastic pro-tax leadership.  We hope his staff took the time to visit their favorite OTR bars and enjoy their favorite beverages.  We will work tirelessly to find good tax-and-spend Republicans to replace those awful fiscal conservatives Monzel and Portune.

Hartmann's Tax Hike fails to gain support

Dear fellow tax hikers, we are facing a moment of truth.  Hamilton County Commissioner Greg Hartmann had planned on passing his big property tax increase at today's Commission meeting, but failed to find a second vote.  This fight continues.  Tax Hike Hartmann is working very hard to raise your taxes and we will stand behind him 100%.  

This is the most important tax increase we have faced....than at anytime in the past two weeks.  Mike Brown deserves that money.  Mike Brown needs that money and he needs it more than you do. 

This property tax increase only affects the stupid homeowners in Hamilton County.  It doesn't affect people like me and my civil domestic partner, or our Section 8 landlord.  Just because the voters were promised this money when they passed the Stadium Sales Tax increase doesn't mean they should get it.  Promises are made to be broken, especially promises made to the lowly taxpayers. 

We condemn Commissioners Chris Monzel and Todd Portune for standing in the way of this fantastic property tax increase.  Monzel needs to learn his role.  Republicans are the party of higher taxes.  It's time for Monzel to stand in line and obey Tax Hike Hartmann and his other superiors.  Contact your Commissioners and ask them to please raise our taxes.  Tax us more!

Support Hartmann's Property Tax Hike

Dear fellow tax hikers, we are delighted to endorse Commissioner Greg Hartmann's property tax increase on the homeowners of Hamilton County.  Tax Hike Hartmann knows that we need higher taxes to give more money to the Bengals and Reds.  Sadly, Tax Hike Hartmann lacks a second vote for his excellent tax increase.  We call on all of you to get busy advocating for more taxes.

When the voters of Hamilton County approved the Stadium Sales Tax increase in 1996, they were promised that 30% of these Sales Tax revenues would be refunded to homeowners in the form of a Property Tax Rollback (PTR).  Through 2009, this promise was kept.  Thankfully in 2010, Commissioners David Pepper and Tax Hike Hartmann broke this promise, knowing that Mike Brown and Bob Bedinghaus could spend that money better than you.

Here we are again facing this same issue for 2012.  Except now, serial tax hiker David Pepper isn't on the Commission.  He's been replaced by Chris Monzel, who stupidly believes that this PTR promise should be kept.  Amazingly, our formerly ally Todd Portune also believes the full PTR should be maintained.

We fully support breaking this promise.  The stupid voters don't deserve this money.  Bob Bedinghaus, Mike Brown, and Jeff Berding should get to spend that money for you.  Promises to the lowly taxpayers are made to be broken.  

This situation leaves Tax Hike Hartmann without a second vote to pass this absolutely necessary tax increase.  We call on all you tax hikers to lobby Monzel and Portune.  Encourage them to break their word to the voters so we can send more money to the stadiums.  We also want you to contact Tax Hike Hartmann's office and thank him for everything he is doing to raise our property taxes.  You don't need that money; the Bengals do.  Tax us more!

Oppose Heather Harlow for Fiscal Officer

Dear fellow tax hikers, we urgently must come together to oppose the re-election of our enemy Heather Harlow for Colerain Township Fiscal Officer.  Harlow's crimes against our tax-and-spend movement are long and severe. 

1.  Was one of only seven elected officials in Hamilton County who opposed the massive 15 year, $777 million Sales Tax increase in 2007.  Everyone was under orders from the political parties and our beloved Sheriff Simon Leis to support this.  Harlow refused to endorse this needed countywide tax increase, and her fellow citizens of Colerain voted it down in record numbers.  We will not tolerate it when an elected official represents their constituents instead of obeying party leaders.

2.  Co-chaired Chris Monzel's campaign for Commissioner instead of supporting our endorsed candidate Leslie Ghiz.  Ghiz deserved that nomination.  Ghiz supported that Sales Tax hike, she endorsed Democrat David Pepper for Commissioner and Mayor, and she voted to start the $200 million streetcar project.

3.  Helped lead the conspiracy against Leslie Ghiz by the Blue Chip Young Republicans, an organization she once lead.  Harlow is one of the people who we blame for that club's unanimous support of Monzel over Ghiz.  

4.  We are also angry that she, as a woman, has been openly supportive of protecting gun rights for law-abiding citizens.  It is not a woman's place to support the 2nd Amendment.  Her job is to support higher taxes on command, and she has failed miserably at that simple task. 

We must unite to stop Heather Harlow!  Her support for limited government, holding the line on taxes, and protecting constitutional rights is completely unacceptable.  Our movement has to stop young, conservative, Republican women before they get too far.  We endorse her male opponent because we need to stop this conservative woman now.  Tax us more!