Sunday, January 9, 2011

Bengals demand more taxpayer gifts

(Missing from Tax Hike Hartmann's Office)

Dear fellow tax hikers, first some in-house business to address.  Whoever has removed this week's Vodka supply from Commissioner Greg Hartmann's office needs to return it IMMEDIATELY!  We cannot expect Tax Hike Hartmann's office to do their job properly - sitting around all day eating, drinking like fish, and raising taxes - if they do not have the proper fluid replenishments available.  This material may be returned with no questions asked by Monday morning's staff meeting.  If not, a full investigation and discipline will commence.

Back to our normal duties, we were delighted to read that the Cincinnati Bengals are now demanding more concessions from Hamilton County.  The Bengals deserve more for the privilege of accepting our taxpayer funded stadium gift, the millions of operating subsidies per year that we provide, and the 4 victories that they produced this year.  This provides a fantastic opportunity for Tax Hike Hartmann and Todd Portune to raise some more taxes to pay for these goodies.

Mike Brown deserves this additional money.  Without Hamilton County taxpayers, Brown would have to pay for his own stadium, his own game day costs, and his own taxes for the stadium land.  Paying for his own expenses might cut into the tens of millions he banks each year.  Now, for the great job he does for the Bengals, he deserves even more taxpayer funds and we expect Portune and Tax Hike Hartmann to provide.

Tax Hike Hartmann has already broken his word to the voters once by repealing most of the Property Tax Rollback that was promised to Hamilton County homeowners.  That should only be the start.  We would like Tax Hike Hartmann to further raise property taxes, and to support Todd Portune's idea to raise the Sales Tax too.  Hamilton County's #1 priority is to enrich Mike Brown.  Now it's time to ante up again.  Tax us more!


The Wise One said...

Can the person who took the Vodka pretty please bring it back? How can we work hard, to raise your taxes, without it?

Alex T. said...

Little known fact, the Greeks, not the Russians invented vodka.