Thursday, May 29, 2014

Melowese Richardson says 'Pay Me'

Dear fellow tax hikers, the Ohio Democratic Party's voting rights hero Melowese Richardson has resurfaced to demand that she be paid by the Hamilton County Board of Elections for her performance on Election Day 2012 when she voted numerous times for Barack Obama.  We fully endorse this demand.

Melowese cast more votes for Barack Obama and than me and my 3 spouses COMBINED!  She deserves to be paid well for these meticulous acts of Felony Vote Fraud, which helped The Messiah get re-elected. 

Sadly, Melowese was sentenced to 5 years in state prison for these so-called crimes.  However, 8 months into her term she decided that she had a "mental illness" and flashed her Get Out of Jail Free card to get an early release.  Her "mental illness" didn't prevent her from committing any crimes, but it did keep her from having to suffer the consequences. 

And when she came back home, Melo returned to a hero's welcome.  At a recent rally with Al Sharpton, attended by numerous Democratic dignitaries including P.G. Sittenfeld and Micah Kamrass, "Bishop" Bobby Hilton brought Melowese on stage to give her a very public tribute for all the good she has done.  When Bishop Hilton cited Melowese as a "voting rights hero" and embraced her in front of everyone, there wasn't a dry eye in the entire complex. 

This is a woman who deserves our tax dollars for all her accomplishments.  We urge the Hamilton County Board of Elections to immediately pay her for her 2012 work, and to give her a huge bonus on top of it.

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Dever defeats Mr. Purity Rick Bryan

Dear fellow tax hikers, the Hamilton County Board of Elections released the official results of the 2014 primaries, and sadly the news is just as bad as it was on election night.  Jonathan Dever officially defeated our very own Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan by 66 votes.

66 stinkin' votes.  Should have just added another 6.

Ricky responded to his defeat by stating: "It was a year that we were done in by low voter turnout and a strong negative campaign."

First of all, we strongly condemn anyone who ran a negative campaign against our Ricky Baby.  We feel so bad for Rick, the Paragon of Virtue and Keeper of All Things Good and Right.  His campaign was as pure as the winter snow.  Rick absolutely did not:

- criticize one of his opponents for not living in the district for each of the last 75 years
- condemn one of his opponents because his bank neglected to pay the insurance premiums he sent them
- refer to streetcar opponents as "bullies"
- claim one of his opponents didn't have a campaign treasurer from the 28th District (note: the address listed for Rick Bryan's campaign is in Peter Stautberg's Tom Brinkman's district)
- criticize both of his opponents for lacking his experience

No, NONE of that happened, because Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan said he ran a fully positive campaign.

Ricky Baby says he ran a positive campaign based on his qualifications and experience.  And no doubt, he had the best of both.

Nobody has more experience raising taxes than Rick Bryan.  Nobody is more qualified to spend money on a $75 million park than Rick Bryan.  And nobody has done more to pay for Blue Ash Council's taxpayer-funded junkets to Germany than Rick Bryan.  We are disgusted that such a positive and pure big government Republican like Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan could lose his election by a mere 66 votes. 

Sunday, May 18, 2014

Monzel honored by local GOP

Dear fellow tax hikers, we have been very angry this weekend (as we usually are).  As if this month hasn't been bad enough for our movement, we suffered another indignity Friday night when the Hamilton County Republican Party honored our enemy Chris Monzel as their Elected Official of the Year

We tax hikers can't imagine anyone less deserving.  Monzel has consistently opposed higher taxes - even opposing the Democratic/Leis Sales Tax hike that we strongly backed.  He opposed sending more taxpayer money to the Freedom Center, and has always opposed our beloved streetcar. 

Monzel is up for re-election this year, and if he had an opponent we would have already endorsed her. 

We condemn the Hamilton County GOP for honoring such a terrible official.  After we progressive tax hikers had to suffer through the victories of Jonathan Dever and Tom Brinkman earlier this month, the party should have tended to our hurt feelings by giving this award to a great tax-and-spender.  A few conservatives may have rigged this award for their buddy Monzel, but we will continue to oppose his efforts to stop tax increases and our streetcar. 

Sunday, May 11, 2014


Dear fellow tax hikers, we are still recovering from the unexpected victory of Jonathan Dever over our very own Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan.  For once we can't criticize ourselves for being complacent in defeat.  This year we worked very hard for Rick and made him our #1 targeted race.  We learned our lessons about being overconfident from some of our prior defeats.

But many of our supporters haven't.  Many of the Bryan supporters here assured us we had this race in the bag.  They said Dever had no chance, and may have even quit the race early.  We were also told Dever didn't raise enough money, couldn't solidify conservative support, and had an inadequate campaign team who surely could not win under such difficult circumstances. 

For your benefit, we have found some of the better premature declarations of victory from the Bryan supporters:


Blue Ash Bomber said...
Just did the work the Enquirer refused to do and checked out the campaign finance report on Secretary of State Jon Husted's website. Folks, this race isn't even going to be close. Rick Bryan has a commanding lead in fund-raising and in cash on hand. Rick also has a commanding lead in endorsements and a significant lead in supporters among the rank and file across the district. That's the kind of network of support you can develop over years of fostering positive working relationships with businesses, elected officials, and community leaders, when you happen to be a businessman, elected official and community leader like Rick Bryan is.

Dever is just gumming up the works and pandering to the Tea Party base that has lost all credibility in the 28th House District. Go back to West Chester, Jonathan.

Wreck of the Jonathan Dever said...
Just like the Democrats' nominee for Governor, Shipwreck Edward FitzGerald, Jonathan Dever had to include his January 2014 contributions on his latest campaign finance report to make his numbers look less horrible than they truly are. Just like Ed, Dever's January contributions were surprisingly large and surprisingly close to the end of the month, a sure sign of desperation by Team Dever. I guess that move into the 28th House District and those "professional" consultants took a lot out of Jonathan during crucial fund-raising periods.

COAST is TOAST said...
Even some tea-partiers like Maggi Cook are supporting Rick Bryan. You know you're a real kook when ever the Tea-bangers can't support you. Down With Dever!

Keep It Coming said...
We love the outpouring of support for Rick Bryan on this blog. It's awesome. Rick has raised more money from more people than his opponent. Rick has far more endorsements than his opponent. His opponent should just drop out now, save everyone's time and money, and get our party united behind Rick Bryan.

Columbus Confidential said...
You Dever people are the absolute laughingstocks of the Republican Party right now. Please do us all a favor and get out of the race before you embarrass yourself and your political party any more so than you already have done.

Lifelong Loyal Hamilton County Republican said...
I don't think WLW is taking the candidacy of Rick's primary opponent very seriously, and when WLW can't take a "Republican" very seriously, then he or she has no chance of winning whatsoever.

Madeira Voter said...
I heard Rick Bryan was running unopposed.

Dever Believer said...
I had high hopes for Jonathan but it's clear he doesn't have the juice to make this race even close. His campaign looks less like a Jamie Schwartz job and more like a Julie Matheny job.

Desperate and Defeated Dever said...
I had big hopes for Jonathan Dever, but those hopes are long gone now. What a waste of a candidacy. I guess the 28th House District really loves paying more in taxes because the candidate of lower taxes has found virtually no traction.

Eric Dorman said...
If it wasn't for this website I wouldn't have known anyone was running against Rick Bryan.

Mimes for Dever said...
Jonathan must be running one of those "quiet" campaigns where you go around and somehow reach all the voters without any signs, handouts, mailers, radio or television commercials.

Relax My Friend said...
All conservatives have NOT, repeat NOT, coalesced around Jonathan Dever. In fact, quite a few of us began to think he had suspended his campaign, given the lack of activity. What a disappointing race.

Dever Fever said...
It takes a special kind of paranoia for this blog to believe that Jonathan Dever has run a viable campaign which has even a snowball's chance of winning against Rick Bryan.

Psychiatrist said...
This blog has an unhealthy obsession with the idea that the Dever campaign is something to fear. I get that you could be concerned about losing... if your opponent were running a strong campaign. However, the Dever team clearly is not.

Relax My Friend said...
These campaign finance reports overlook that Jonathan still has to pay his "consultant" Jamie Schwartz for some more "consulting" work like creating that juvenile and offensive attack ad. Ya!

Thursday, May 8, 2014

Stunning defeat

Dear fellow tax hikers, we are devastated by the unexpected loss of our Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan to that Jonathan Dever guy.  We are so distraught by this defeat that if any of us had jobs, we would have had to stay home today. 

How did we lose this race?  We were up in the polls.  We raised more money.  Ricky Baby raised the taxes, jacked up the spending, and took his share of German junkets at taxpayer expense that entitled him to this seat.  We even tricked our enemies at COAST to send a last-minute mailer advertising some of the best tax hikes from our 2011 Tax Hiker of the Year.

We were assured by our expert commentators that Ricky had this in the bag.  They told us Dever had no support, except for his inner campaign team, who were all idiots.  Some even said Dever had quit the race.  We lost to that?

This represents another failure of our movement.  It represents a failure to properly communicate our tax-and-spend message.  It represents a failure of the voters to learn who the great tax hikers are and support their campaign. 

And perhaps worst of all, this defeat represents a failure of Mustache Power when we needed it the most.

We now turn this discussion over to our loyal readers.  Tell us, why did Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan blow his lead to lose the race? 

Wednesday, May 7, 2014


Last night didn't really happen, did it?

Sunday, May 4, 2014

Top 10 Reasons to Support Rick Bryan

Dear fellow tax hikers, with Election Day less than 36 hours away we are calling on you to give everything you have to nominate Rick Bryan for State Representative.  Rick is the epitome of what our movement stands for.  He has raised so many taxes, jacked up spending so high, and taken so many taxpayer-funded vacations that we can't think of anyone who better represents our tax-and-spend beliefs. 

His opponent, conservative Jonathan Dever, must be stopped.  Dever is running on a conservative platform of cutting taxes and cutting government spending.  He opposes the Cincinnati streetcar and supports the right of disabled children to keep their service animals. 

In addition, Dever is far too young for this position.  Dever is barely over age 40, which makes him at least 35 years younger than the average Rick Bryan supporter.

Ricky Bryan has compiled a fantastic record of increasing taxes and raising the roof on government spending.  This is why we were enormously proud to name him our 2011 Tax Hiker of the Year. 

With that, we present our Top 10 Reasons to Vote for Rick Bryan:

1) Raised Earnings Taxes 25%
2) Endorsed a huge Democratic Sales Tax hike
3) Voted to build a $75 million park
4) Helped fund the Cincinnati streetcar
5) Spent $120,200 in 5 years on taxpayer-funded junkets to Germany
6) Took away a service animal from a disabled child
7) More than doubled the hotel-motel tax
8) Paid a band to not perform
9) Praised Bob Bedinghaus' handling of the stadiums
10) World's Greatest Mustache!

Now it's your turn.  Why are YOU supporting Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan? 

Thursday, May 1, 2014

Crystal Faulkner says Just Add Pepper

Dear fellow tax hikers, we welcome you to our 7th and Final Edition of....... The Crystal Faulkner Democratic Donation of the Week.  What could be more satisfying than donating to Democrat David Pepper?  How about donating to him twice.  And what's better than that?  Donate a third time! 

Democratic Donor Crystal Faulkner Cooney is a "problem solver".  Just ask her.  To MS. Faulkner, there is no problem in Ohio that can't be solved if you Just Add Pepper.  We previously reported on Crystal's $1000 donation to David Pepper for State Auditor, as well as her $500 donation

MS. Faulkner wasn't done supporting her Democratic man.  She made a third donation of another $500.  When Crystal decides we need more Democrats elected statewide, she gets down to business. 

By supporting liberal Democrat David Pepper with 3 checks for $2000, MS. Faulkner demonstrated that she is all in for:

- higher taxes
- abortion on demand
- gun control
- "marriage equality" for gays, groups, incestors, and polygamists
- obedience to the labor unions
- stomping out religious freedom
- lax voter laws that allow Melowese Richardson to vote as many times as she wants

These are obviously MS. Faulkner's values, or else she wouldn't have donated $2000 to Pepper.  If these are your values too, we implore you to support Crystal Faulkner Cooney for Republican State Central Committee.  This can be the future of our party.