Fellow tax hikers, we must come together quickly to help our great Sheriff Simon Leis complete the purchase of a badly needed boat. Currently, Leis is only able to utilize 3 boats to patrol the dangerous criminals living on the Ohio River. The problems could get even worse.
What would happen if a foreign country launched a naval attack against Hamilton County? That's right, we'd call on the Sheriff to protect us. What if Kentucky attacked? Simon Leis needs that boat to deter the Kentucky National Guard from trying to take over Hamilton County. By giving him another boat, we give him the tools to repel a foreign invader such as Kentucky.
During tough budget times like these it's vitally important to acquire all of the toys we can. Simon Leis needs that boat. Hamilton County needs that boat. For our safety, we need that boat. We applaud Simon Leis for his vision and for taking the necessary steps to keep Hamilton County safe from foreign invaders.
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9 comments:
You bonehead, Kentucky owns the Ohio river up to the high water mark on the north bank, which is several feet inland at normal river level. Sheriff Lies[sic] would be out of his jurisdiction to run patrols there.
I wholeheartedly support my beloved Sheriff. What do you mean we do not own the river? H-E-L-L-O, it's called the OHIO river! Next week I will propose that the city buy its own fishing boat and do some patrolling of our own.
I think Sharonville should buy one of its own. Does anyone know where I can apply for such a grant, or should I just raise taxes again?
Just curious, can anyone explain why all the boats the Sheriff currently has isn't enough to patrol the 10 feet of the Ohio River that is actually our's? It seems that Senile Simon should have better places to spend money
Can I raise taxes to pay for this much needed new boat?
Maybe Simon will take me fishing with his new boat.
I would happily raise taxes to bring my community a fishing boat. After all, don't they call us "Blue" Ash because of all the water here?
You know the Greeks invented fishing boats.
Fu*%$K you all!
@#$%^&*#@!#%!!!!!!
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