Fellow tax hikers, we must come together quickly to help our great Sheriff Simon Leis complete the purchase of a badly needed boat. Currently, Leis is only able to utilize 3 boats to patrol the dangerous criminals living on the Ohio River. The problems could get even worse.
What would happen if a foreign country launched a naval attack against Hamilton County? That's right, we'd call on the Sheriff to protect us. What if Kentucky attacked? Simon Leis needs that boat to deter the Kentucky National Guard from trying to take over Hamilton County. By giving him another boat, we give him the tools to repel a foreign invader such as Kentucky.
During tough budget times like these it's vitally important to acquire all of the toys we can. Simon Leis needs that boat. Hamilton County needs that boat. For our safety, we need that boat. We applaud Simon Leis for his vision and for taking the necessary steps to keep Hamilton County safe from foreign invaders.