Dear fellow tax hikers across the gender spectrum, we are delighted to report that the City of Cincinnati has decided to cover sex change operations for its employees!
Are you a man desiring to be a woman? A butch who wants to be a man? Or maybe you just want to experiment. If you work for Cincinnati you are in luck! You can have your very own sex change operation, courtesy of Cincinnati taxpayers.
This change was initiated by City Manager Scott Stiles and City Councilman Chris Seelbach, and signed by Councilmen P.G. Sittenfeld, Wendell Young, Yvette Simpson, and David Mann (or is it David Woman). Stiles says this move "keeps the City competitive as an employer."
Because we all know that Cincinnati can't recruit workers unless they know they can get a free sex change.
This policy is said to cover "medically necessary" transgender procedures. At first we asked ourselves what is a medically necessary sex change but eventually we figured it out.
If you're a guy who watches QVC, then you have a medical need for a sex change operation.
If you're a woman with 10 or more pieces of Birkenstock apparel, then there is definitely a man inside you yearning to be free.
And if you're a Councilman who spends most of your time whining about others, and subsidizes sex change surgeries while expecting others to subsidize your icons......
We fully endorse this policy. If you work for the City of Cincinnati and want to change your sex, everyone else should have to pay for it.