However, as Portune and his mustache have traveled around Ohio seeking support, he was confronted by this vicious attack:
Showing posts with label Mustache Power. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Mustache Power. Show all posts
Sunday, December 29, 2013
Todd Portune for Governor?
Dear fellow tax hikers, we blog tonight to honor and defend one of the biggest icons in local politics - Todd Portune's mustache. As Todd ponders whether to run for Ohio Governor, we want everyone to understand the source of his strength - Mustache Power. It is the power that drives Southwest Ohio politics.
However, as Portune and his mustache have traveled around Ohio seeking support, he was confronted by this vicious attack:
We may sometimes allow you to attack Portune, but never Bash the Stache! His legendary mustache must be defended at all costs. Whether Todd runs for Governor or not, the 'stache stays where it is.
However, as Portune and his mustache have traveled around Ohio seeking support, he was confronted by this vicious attack:
Thursday, October 20, 2011
Rick Bryan - 2011 Tax Hiker of the Year
Dear fellow tax hikers, we proudly name Blue Ash City Councilman Rick Bryan our 2011 Tax Hiker of the Year. Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan has an extensive record of raising taxes and growing the size of government.
Most people familiar with Rick say that he is one of the least hardworking and most irrelevant politicians in Southwest Ohio, and for the most part they are correct. But we love Rick anyways because he works very hard at two things - raising taxes and building big taxpayer-funded monuments. Consider the Rick Bryan record:
1) Teamed with former Attorney General Marc Dann to endorse a 15 year, $777 million Sales Tax increase on Hamilton County residents. Sadly, 56% of county voters rejected Rick's huge Sales Tax hike.
2) Publicly endorsed a 2006 Charter Amendment giving Blue Ash City Council the authority to raise the city's earnings tax from a measly 1% to 1.25%.
3) As soon as this amendment passed, Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan wasted no time taking advantage of this power by voting to raise the earnings tax by 25% on the undertaxed residents and workers of Blue Ash.
4) After raising the earnings tax, our Rick has enthusiastically pushed to spend it all on vitally important items such as a $14 million Rec Center rebuild (when it could have been renovated for $3 million), a big new park, a new arts center (30 feet from Sharonville's), AND The Big All-Important Golf Course Clubhouse Expansion. While many communities are wasting their money on things like police, fire, roads, and snow removal, Bryan makes sure Blue Ash focuses on building big expensive monuments on which they can hang an expensive plaque with the names of each City Councilman.
5) Strongly supported the re-election of our hero Bob Bedinghaus for all the great things he did for Hamilton County. We needed those stadium deals, and we're glad Rick Bryan understands this.
6) Voted to have Blue Ash City Council endorse the tax increase which more than doubled the Hotel/Motel Tax in Hamilton County. This tax increase was pushed by Virgil Lovitt, sponsored by Jean Schmidt, and signed into law by Bob Taft - a legendary trio of tax hikers.
7) Opposed the nomination of our nemesis Pat DeWine for Judge. DeWine opposed the $777 million Sales Tax increase that Bryan endorsed, and our Rick wanted to make sure DeWine was severely punished for his fiscally conservative ways.
8) A fine example of Rick's efforts to make Blue Ash so "well-run", the City actually paid a band to NOT perform at the Taste of Blue Ash. Never have we seen a wiser use of taxpayer dollars.
9) Finally, Rick proudly wears his big, manly, mad-sexy mustache everywhere he goes. Given his poor work ethic and limited ability to understand complex issues, Rick Bryan needs that Mustache Power to be the tax-hiking superstar he has become today.
As you can see, Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan is a fantastic tax increaser and is highly deserving of his Tax Hiker of the Year Award. He doesn't do many things well, but nobody can deny his superior skills at raising taxes and building big monuments. We hope everyone will join us in congratulating our 2011 Tax Hiker of the Year Rick Bryan!
Most people familiar with Rick say that he is one of the least hardworking and most irrelevant politicians in Southwest Ohio, and for the most part they are correct. But we love Rick anyways because he works very hard at two things - raising taxes and building big taxpayer-funded monuments. Consider the Rick Bryan record:
1) Teamed with former Attorney General Marc Dann to endorse a 15 year, $777 million Sales Tax increase on Hamilton County residents. Sadly, 56% of county voters rejected Rick's huge Sales Tax hike.
2) Publicly endorsed a 2006 Charter Amendment giving Blue Ash City Council the authority to raise the city's earnings tax from a measly 1% to 1.25%.
3) As soon as this amendment passed, Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan wasted no time taking advantage of this power by voting to raise the earnings tax by 25% on the undertaxed residents and workers of Blue Ash.
4) After raising the earnings tax, our Rick has enthusiastically pushed to spend it all on vitally important items such as a $14 million Rec Center rebuild (when it could have been renovated for $3 million), a big new park, a new arts center (30 feet from Sharonville's), AND The Big All-Important Golf Course Clubhouse Expansion. While many communities are wasting their money on things like police, fire, roads, and snow removal, Bryan makes sure Blue Ash focuses on building big expensive monuments on which they can hang an expensive plaque with the names of each City Councilman.
5) Strongly supported the re-election of our hero Bob Bedinghaus for all the great things he did for Hamilton County. We needed those stadium deals, and we're glad Rick Bryan understands this.
6) Voted to have Blue Ash City Council endorse the tax increase which more than doubled the Hotel/Motel Tax in Hamilton County. This tax increase was pushed by Virgil Lovitt, sponsored by Jean Schmidt, and signed into law by Bob Taft - a legendary trio of tax hikers.
7) Opposed the nomination of our nemesis Pat DeWine for Judge. DeWine opposed the $777 million Sales Tax increase that Bryan endorsed, and our Rick wanted to make sure DeWine was severely punished for his fiscally conservative ways.
8) A fine example of Rick's efforts to make Blue Ash so "well-run", the City actually paid a band to NOT perform at the Taste of Blue Ash. Never have we seen a wiser use of taxpayer dollars.
9) Finally, Rick proudly wears his big, manly, mad-sexy mustache everywhere he goes. Given his poor work ethic and limited ability to understand complex issues, Rick Bryan needs that Mustache Power to be the tax-hiking superstar he has become today.
As you can see, Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan is a fantastic tax increaser and is highly deserving of his Tax Hiker of the Year Award. He doesn't do many things well, but nobody can deny his superior skills at raising taxes and building big monuments. We hope everyone will join us in congratulating our 2011 Tax Hiker of the Year Rick Bryan!
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Don't blame the mustache
Dear fellow tax hikers, yesterday our Messiah Barack Obama suffered a horrendous defeat in New York's 9th Congressional District. This Democratic district in liberal New York City elected a Tea Party Republican Bob Turner to Congress with an astounding 53% of the vote.
One specific reason being cited for this loss hurts us the most. The mustache. Democratic candidate David Weprin has a mustache and some are citing this as one of the factors that hurt him.
Weprin had other things working against him going into Tuesday's vote: his endorsement of same-sex marriage, which enraged many of the Orthodox Jewish voters; his membership in a political party blamed by many for the country's economic mess; his perceived lack of familiarity with the district; even his mustache. "Really … you look sleazy," said Pearl Siegelman, a Democratic district leader in Brooklyn's Sheepshead Bay, where one polling station recorded 69% support for Turner despite the large number of voters there who are a lot like Weprin: Orthodox Jewish Democrats.
We refuse to sit back and allow anyone to take a swipe at Mustache Power. This underrated advantage has powered many of our victories. Look at all the mustaches throughout our region - 2008 Tax Hiker of the Year Virgil Lovitt, Blue Ash City Councilman Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan, 2007 Tax Hiker of the Year Bill Seitz, Todd Portune, Leslie Ghiz, and Jean Schmidt.
You can criticize Obama for his lack of support for Israel. Criticize him for not doing enough to promote his tax increases. You can criticize Weprin for running a lousy campaign. For supporting gay marriage. But whatever you do, do not criticize the 'stache. Mustache Power is still a potent force.
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