Wednesday, September 14, 2011

Don't blame the mustache



Dear fellow tax hikers, yesterday our Messiah Barack Obama suffered a horrendous defeat in New York's 9th Congressional District.  This Democratic district in liberal New York City elected a Tea Party Republican Bob Turner to Congress with an astounding 53% of the vote. 

One specific reason being cited for this loss hurts us the most.  The mustache.  Democratic candidate David Weprin has a mustache and some are citing this as one of the factors that hurt him. 

Weprin had other things working against him going into Tuesday's vote: his endorsement of same-sex marriage, which enraged many of the Orthodox Jewish voters; his membership in a political party blamed by many for the country's economic mess; his perceived lack of familiarity with the district; even his mustache. "Really … you look sleazy," said Pearl Siegelman, a Democratic district leader in Brooklyn's Sheepshead Bay, where one polling station recorded 69% support for Turner despite the large number of voters there who are a lot like Weprin: Orthodox Jewish Democrats. 

We refuse to sit back and allow anyone to take a swipe at Mustache Power.   This underrated advantage has powered many of our victories.  Look at all the mustaches throughout our region - 2008 Tax Hiker of the Year Virgil Lovitt, Blue Ash City Councilman Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan, 2007 Tax Hiker of the Year Bill Seitz, Todd Portune, Leslie Ghiz, and Jean Schmidt. 

You can criticize Obama for his lack of support for Israel.  Criticize him for not doing enough to promote his tax increases.  You can criticize Weprin for running a lousy campaign.  For supporting gay marriage.  But whatever you do, do not criticize the 'stache.  Mustache Power is still a potent force.

4 comments:

The Mustache of Blue Ash said...

If the mustache is a liability then my political career is over.

Tax Hikin' Rick Bryan
Blue Ash's Premier City Councilman

Senor Virgilo Lovetto said...

Long live the 'stache!!!

Viva la 'stache!!!

Tax Hike Seitz said...

Shit....

Margaret W said...

I've spent thousands of dollars trying to hide my mustache. People might think I was one of those ugly, smelly, inbreeding west-siders if they saw mine