Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Wyoming School Board wants 37-year tax increase

Dear fellow tax hikers, we are delighted to report that the citizens of Wyoming (the city, not the state) will have an opportunity to pass themselves a big property tax hike that will last 37 years.  The Wyoming School Board voted unanimously to place a 4.79 mill property tax increase on the March 6th ballot, which would cost homeowners approximately $145 per $100,000 of home valuation.

The best part is this tax increase will last for 37 years!  In other words, John Pepper, Frances Pepper, Big Barry Porter, and Jim O'Reilly will die long before this tax will.  Or consider the 25+ kids from the Wyoming High School Class of 2011 who managed to get themselves arrested in their first year as an adult - they will be 56 years old when this tax levy expires.  This would be a fantastic gift to leave them!

This big property tax hike is necessary to spend needed money on the Middle School.  It's old.  Therefore it needs a $25 million infusion of new tax money.  They must spend $25 million for urgent upgrades like wider hallways, more meeting space, and a larger gym, in addition to a new state-of-the-art full-service bar in the school cafeteria.

School Board Party Mom Lynn Larson strongly believes a full-service bar is necessary to prepare the middle school kids for their expected high school life.  And to help them simulate a typical Saturday night party at the Larson estate.  We applaud Mrs. Larson for supporting this urgently-needed tax increase and for everything she's done for the school district.

Please ignore the fact that the Wyoming City Schools were knocked down a level in the state rankings, and now rank just one level ahead of the Cincinnati Public Schools.  Larson is blameless.  We'll do exactly what Lynn Larson does when something goes wrong - blame it on the Wyoming Police Department instead of taking any personal responsibility for her failures as a parent and School Board Member.  The School Board's failures prove how badly Wyoming needs higher taxes.  Tax us more!


Lady Lord Lynn Larson said...

I'll drink to that. And I can't wait to vote for this very important tax increase.

Taxhike Hartman said...

sign me up!

Anonymous said...

I wonder if Ms. Vicky Zwissler has already placed a homemade pro-tax sign in her yard.