Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Matt Borges for ORP Chairman

Dear fellow tax hikers, we strongly endorse convicted criminal Matt Borges to be the next Chairman of the Ohio Republican Party (ORP).  Only by uniting behind a convicted criminal can we Republicans finally prove to Ohioans that we are the party that can be trusted to guide our state and nation.

From the Cincinnati Enquirer, 2004:

Borges, 32, of Columbus pleaded guilty to one count of improper use of public office, a misdemeanor, and was fined $1,000 by Cuyahoga County Common Pleas Judge Eileen Gallagher. Court documents said he gave preferential treatment to certain brokers who made contributions to Deters' re-election campaign. 

Following this came Bob Taft's four criminal convictions and the Tom Noe scandal.  By electing Matt Borges as ORP Chairman, we can return our party to the good-ole Culture of Corruption days when we used state government as an ATM for our friends, family, and campaign donors. 

The truth is we need Matt Borges to run our party and we are thankful he is running.  The new Republican Party has to reach out to voters who typically vote Democratic - such as blacks, Jews, Muslims, and convicted criminals.  By putting a criminal in charge of the ORP, we can finally have the street cred to appeal to the criminal element and bring them into the GOP column.  Matt Borges for Ohio Republican Party Chairman. 


State Legislative Trainee Billy Blessing said...

Relax. What's a little criminality among friends?

Princess Margaret said...

I can't wait until the new chairman is installed and we get to go to the welcoming reception and I get to go buy a new cocktail dress, and new shoes, a new handbag and get my hair, make-up and nails done up yet again. It's so much fun being a very important political professional. Besides, a night in Columbus means a night without dealing with any smelly, fat, uncouth, disgusting, inbred west siders!

Kathy Mohr said...

Goodness, really pulling my hair out over how I feel about this one. This is why I might be extra-scowly lately.

The Tea Partier in me says this is an unconscionable action to put someone so connected to the Establishment and with a criminal record in charge of Republican Party leadership.

But then again this isn't in Colerain Township where anything the Republicans do angers me to no end, with that whole losing the election thing to some unqualified nobody back in 2003.

Ya know, that's probably the best route to take. Just lay low on this. I also have to see where the people who pay the bills for my exhaustive public records request and research feel about this. I would think they would want to maybe stay on the good side of the Republican Party, the way they control the Ohio Supreme Court and everything.

Price Hill racist anti-semetic PIG Craig Hochscheid said...

I was with you until you started all of that talk about welcoming blacks and jews into the party. Bon Vivants don't associate with "those people".

Obese hog Tabitha Hochscheid said...

I could never be jewish. A girl like me needs her daily dose of pig! Enjoyed a pork chop stuffed with ham, wrapped in fatback, and deep fried in lard for breakfast, and then washed it down with a cool, refreshing glass of bacon grease.

My love of pigs also has a lot to do with my choice of spouse. Oink oink Craig!

Ethically Challenged Ex-Congresswoman Jean Schmidt said...

This guy is my kind of chairman! Out of my way so I can be first in line to suck up to him for another political position. Elected, appointed, doesn't really matter.

They need to deliver for me.

Jeff Hardin has been dead a whole week and it's long past time to appoint me to that spot.

Prosecutor Tough on Crime Deters said...

Waaaah waah waah. I'm done talking about this, because I'm only tough on the criminals who *don't* work for me.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go defend my boss Stan Chesley.

Joe the Schmoe said...

"Some day, people will want to build a statue for Bob Bedinghaus,” said Hamilton County Republican Party chairman Joe Deters. “Some day, people will understand what a visionary he is."

Bob Bedinghaus, Stan Chesley, Matt Borges - that Joe Deters isn't a very good judge of character, is he?


GOP Stooge George Bruneman said...

I haven't heard from the Hamilton County GOP on this one yet, so I don't know what I'm supposed to think yet. Help me out Alex! How can I tell the increasingly small group of 80 year olds at my meetings at The Farm what the conservative position is if the GOP establishment doesn't tell me first?