We soundly condemn the bigoted policies being promoted by the two loudest sides of the current marriage debate - both the gay marriage advocates and the traditional marriage side. The only issue those two sides disagree on is whether two gays have the right to marry each other.
They would discriminate against us polygamists who want to marry the people we love. They would discriminate against us bisexuals who would like to marry (at least) one man and one woman. They would discriminate against those of us who believe incest marriages are as full of love and joy as any other marriage. If a man and his sister would like to enter an incestuous polygamist bisexual group marriage with their mother and father, who are you to deny? Keep your religion out of
Those who are claiming to support Marriage Equality are promoting bigotry. They believe everyone is equal, except those who aren't. We at Republicans for Higher Taxes fully support Real Marriage Equality. We want to marry the people we love - all the people we love.
This post is our coming out party. Me and my civil domestic partner are both polygamist bisexual incestors. We would like to marry each other and my mother-in-law, and gradually add to the marriage as time passes, but due to the sad discrimination we are not being allowed to marry the ones we love the most. We will not stand for this anymore. We demand REAL Marriage Equality. Anything less is legal bigotry.
31 comments:
I'd love it if people could marry as many people as they want. Can you imagine all the wedding receptions someone as beautiful, charming, gracious, and humble as me would get invited to? And how many new outfits I would need to buy for each blessed occasion? And how many times I would need to get my hair, makeup, nails, and other things we won't mention here done? Marriage equality would be a great boost to the economy! Except on the west side, where no one would want to marry any of those fat, smelly, disgusting people?
I should count for AT LEAST 3 people.
Real Marriage Equality? Hahaha. Once I get my equality you're on your own suckazz.
Our ranks are full of progressive Republicans who totally agree with this assessment. If you want your opinions on issues like this to matter like ours do, all you have to do is pony up the $500 membership fee to join our frat, errr, organization.
Who cares about marriage? As long as I can get the taxpayers to foot the bill for my healthcare, I'm happier than hell. Sodomy with a councilman has its privileges!
Me don't sea no problums with offspring of incest.
I plan on riding this issue to the end, right into a City Council seat just like Chris Seelbach. Who cares where I stand on actual important issues that impact the every day lives of Cincinnati citizens? If there's anything I've learned from Chris it's how to ride something to completion.
Real Marriage Equality would make it MUCH easier for the old man to find someone for me to marry. When limited just to females I'm not related to, he didn't do so well. If he hadn't gotten me this new job, I don't know what I'd be dong right now, probably spending a lot of "me" time in the park.
For completely unbiased, fair, and non-political coverage of this important issue make sure to check the WCPO website, where I'm now contributing "news" content.
Bwahahahahahahahahahaha. Psyche!!!
Anyone who knows me would know where I stand on this issue because I am rock-solidly principled and an unabashed conservative. Except that I am completely non-political. Well, except for those three political campaigns I was a candidate, the politician i worked for, the lobbying i did to bring sx offenders into Cincinnati,and those political campaigns I managed, and the political operative I married and the political campaign I ran in Madeira that got totally smoked by the voters of Madeira. Believe me, I am so honest and transparent, everyone knows what I am all about.
With Real Marriage Equality, we could require all of our candidates, for any office, at any level, to marry into the Winkler, Deters, Ghiz, DeWine, Taft, Dinkelacker, or Blessing families and also change their names accordingly. This would be huge for the Republican machine in Hamilton County! Could you imagine the savings in yard signs alone?
Tax hikers, please bring this discussion back on topic. Future posts must discuss Marriage Equality or the extremely important Real Marriage Equality Movement we are starting.
Sign me up for some Real Marriage Equality. That would be a huge hit back home in New York City.
I'd love to run the Real Marriage Equality campaign. I could do for marriage what I did for Jim Raussen, Tom Weidman, Pete Beck, Jean Schmidt, and of course my own election to Springdale City Council. Just imagine what the possibilities would be.
Real Marriage Equality is a bad idea! In fact, we don't like anything being equal, because no one can be as perfect as we are. Ever. Especially our garbage-infested neighbors to the north!
Cmon everyone keep it clean. There was no need to post someone's marriage document, even if it was an elected official.
With Real Marriage Equality, we could institute a "Marriage Fee" in Blue Ash when couples or groups want to get married in front of our beautiful veterans monument, or anywhere else in Blue Ash, and we could make millions to subsidize our rec center and our golf course!
We would NEVER allow such deviant behavior as Gay Marriage or Real Marriage Eqaulity to bring down the community standards in lovely Sycamore Township! Perverts need to find another community to infest, like Wyoming.
Switching from support of gay marriage, which we already support, to Real Marriage Equality is easy! And fun! We will work tirelessly for Real Marriage Equality, right after we get Jean Schmidt back in Congress!
I need to do something about this before the vein on my forehead completely pops! In my never-ending quest to push out the current Colerain Township Fiscal Officer and install the preferred choice of my patrons in the Colerain Township Business Association, I need a new rumor to spread around town. Perhaps telling everyone in White Oak that she supports Real Marriage Equality will be the final straw and we can finally realize my long-held quest to rid the leadership of the last tentacles of the Bernie Fiedeldey Reign Of Error.
I can think of a large number of politicians and at least one self-described non-political person who could benefit from having more than one spouse the same way they benefit from having more than one position on any given issue.
These are actually pretty close to the exact legal arguments we'll be making in the future if we can just get The Supreme Court to rule that due to "equality" the nation must permit gay marriage. The Constitution provides as much support for gay marriage as it does polygamous marriage and incest marriage. So if gays can be married due to a broad reading of what equality means, they'll have no choice but to allow marriage to other groups of adults who currently can't get married.
Equality means equality. For everyone, not just for some.
Even though your Real Marriage Equality arguments are intellectually superior to the ones us Marriage Equality folks have been making, I'm going to decline to endorse your position. However if one of my kids declares that they are polygamous or incestuous, I'll be with you in a couple years.
With all the coverage my criminal record is getting, most people have forgotten that I was a lobbyist for the gay marriage group Equality Ohio. Which I now think should be named 'Sort-of Equality Ohio' since they don't support Real Marriage Equality.
At first, the idea of Real Marriage Equality completely repulsed me. Then I realized that I could have a husband for each of my political odyssey. I could have a Republican husband for when I am a Republican and was a Republican candidate. Then, I could have a DemocRAT husband to reflect the time I sought the state senate as a DemocRAT and also the DemocRAT elected official I work for now. I could have an Independent husband for all those times I ran as an independent and claim to be one when it suits me. Finally, I could have a Tea Party Husband for my recent involvement in the Tea Party . In addition, I would have 4 separate homes, which I will need due to the voluminous requests for public information I make in Colerain Township on a regular basis.
I'll drink to that.
Wow, just imagine how complicated tax returns would become with Real Marriage Equality. I'd make a killing as a CPA and a Master of Taxation. It might get a little awkward as a lector proclaiming the Word of God at certain Catholic churches on Sundays at the same time. But the real problem would be that all that time spent on complicated tax returns would cut into the time I would be able to invest running for office in Colerain Township, er, uh, I mean being a dedicated community volunteer in Colerain Township.
Great idea, Jeff! I will take care of telling everyone at St. John that our esteemed fiscal officer supports Real Marriage Equality. They believe everything I say out here. I will also see what our good friend Jennie can do for us, maybe get something in print. She's always good for printing whatever we tell her to print, isn't she? Just wish there was a way I could make some money at this. Mans got to pay some bills, you know.
Real Marriage Equality would improve my chances of being able to move out of this crappy neighborhood that isn't even really a neighborhood officially. Bad enough I am in this total dive of a condo complex, but these two obese, disgusting neighbors of mine make matters even worse.
I'd love to be able to find someone to take me in so I could be movin' on up, to the east side, to a dee-luxe apartment in the sky!
So desperate to get out of here, there's no telling what I would do, or who I could do it with.
We laugh at the cosmic ineptitude of our neighbors to the north. Most, but not all, of the elected officials in Colerain are magnificent people, but for some reason, you all cower in the fear of one crazed maniacal businessman who wants to control everything there is to control in Colerain Township and beyond.
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