Monday, January 28, 2013

Colerain Police arrest man for BB Gun photo

Dear fellow tax hikers, Colerain Township has made the Drudge Report with their latest in high-tech crime fighting.  Colerain Police arrested a man for posting a facebook photo of himself, his 1 year-old child, and a BB gun - all in one photograph.  This dangerous criminal was hauled to the downtown jail and held without bond. 

Thank goodness the police were there when they were needed.  Otherwise this 1 year-old child might have overpowered his father, stolen the car, and used this Assault BB gun to shoot up Northgate Mall. 

The timing could not be more perfect.  As we reported last week, Colerain Township is seeking a new property tax increase to raise more money for their police department.  What could better demonstrate the urgency for this tax hike than learning that the police are arresting people for taking photographs with their kid and a BB gun?

Without higher taxes, the Colerain Police might not have the resources to solve vicious crimes like these.  Without higher taxes, they might have to focus their efforts on other things.  We applaud the Colerain Police Department for their fantastic work in quickly solving this terrible crime.  We hope this incident reminds everyone of the need for another property tax increase so the police can continue keeping Facebook photo-free solving important crimes against humanity. 


Lascivious Lou-Bill Blessing said...

I prefer them stalking residents' facebook pages to patrolling the parks at night.

Greed Township Republicans said...

This "Delhi Rapist" on the news was always raping women at bars in Colerain Township. Wonder why he found it so easy to find women to rape in Colerain Township.

Did he know that trashy women would hang out in "Garbagetown" and no one would believe their stories?

Or did he know that the police in Colerain would be too busy trolling Facebook to catch an actual rapist?

Regardless, this means he had to cut through our commuity in order to commit his horrendous crimes and return home.

Why are we always made to suffer because of the problems caused by Colerain Township????

Colerain Taxpayer said...

I can't wait to vote for this levy and show my support for higher taxes in Colerain Township. As anyone who watches the 11:00 news knows, our police chief totally deserved that big raise and our brand new administrator definitely did too. Look at how much safer that whole Northgate Mall area has become. Except for the liquor store getting robbed, and the Pizza Hut getting robbed and the Burger King getting robbed over the past... month or so... yeah, that completely innovative and ground-breaking partnership where taxpayers subsidize the rent-a-cops at the mall is really paying off. Good job, Jim and Dan. That raise is so well-deserved.

Ex Resident of Colerain said...

Ah, yes, the Colerain Township police, where the guilty go free and the victims are arrested because the cops fear the criminals. Only in Colerain Township could a man go on a violent vandalism rampage and the person who calls to report it gets arrested because the hoodlum's mother said it didn't happen. The shattered glass of multiple cars windows right there on the ground was obviously a figment of the racist victim's imagination.

Tom H said...

See, if only the people of Colerain Township had elected ME fiscal officer, I would have been able to tell the trustees earlier that the township was running low on police funds and they could have made corrections. This is because I am a CPAand a military veteran who knows how to read spreadsheets, unlike the English major who currently holds the office.

I also came up with the plan to create the Dry Ridge connector at 1:00 in the morning in a long meeting when I was a trustee. So that means I could manage the police department better than anyone.

I also had someone who is not involved in politics tell me I would make a great trustee in 2007. So that means I could manage the police department better than anyone.

I also started the Taste of Colerain and it was my suggestion to move it to its current location. So that means I could manage the police department better than anyone.

I also saved the Taste of Colerain from extinction twice and brought peace to the warring factions. So that means I could manage the police department better than anyone.

Anonymous said...

glad I pulled that facebook pic of me and my kid with a slingshot before the cops saw it. phew!

veritas vos libertas said...

I hope no one reports the truth on that Republican and Tea Party activist whose name you would surely know and who was once prosecuted by someone whose name you would also surely know. It would make the GOP look really, really bad right now and make the stupidity going on in the crime infested ghetto known as Colerain Township look tame by comparison.

These people clearly do not believe in background checks, right Ashtray?

JFR said...

Tom, I told you not to go up to the administration building and start talking to the Colerain Township staff about the changes you would be making, a month before the freaking election, remember?

You couldn't wait until I could get everyone together at my house. At least you had the good sense to stop in on a day she wasn't there, but still.

Way too risky man. Next time just be cool, OK?

Republican Insider said...

Looks like the wimps on the board gave in to those bothersome Tea Partiers and gave more than 48 hours' notice this time. At least they chose an equaly inconvenient and disruptive time.

The Colerain Township Board of Trustees has scheduled a Special Meeting to be held at the Colerain Township Government Complex, Administration Building, 4200 Springdale Road, on Friday, February 1, 2013 at 4:00p.m.

The purpose of the meeting is to go into executive session to discuss the employment and compensation of public employees. Following the Executive Session, the Board will convene in Public Session to consider a lease agreement for the Skyline Community Center and additional Police Levy options for the May ballot.

Colerain Confidential said...

I hear one of the trustees nearly popped a vein when he heard about this site and what was going on here and also at

Oh, what a tangled web we weave...