Dear fellow tax hikers, the end of our journey to elect great tax-hikers like Barack Obama and Sean Donovan is in sight. We have endorsed a fantastic team of big government advocates. We will recap those endorsements and add a few more so that we can vote for the finest team of tax hikers we've ever seen.
Barack Obama for President. It is vital to the future of our country to re-elect Our Messiah Barack Obama. Obama has given us massive tax increases, vast government expansion into healthcare, four consecutive budget deficits of over $1 Trillion, Wall Street bailouts, and an additional $6 Trillion in debt that someday will require significant tax increases to pay off.
Sean Donovan for Sheriff. Donovan is the finest Republican on the ballot. His support for streetcars, higher taxes, double dippers, and a large Administrative staff makes him the class of the Republican Party.
Tracy Winkler for Clerk of Courts. We endorsed Tracy a long time ago and reiterate that support. We don't care whether the Clerk of Courts office is run well, Tracy doesn't care, and you shouldn't care either. Tracy hired Jennifer Triantafilou to a Green Township job that she was completely unqualified for, and in return Alex Triantafilou rewarded her with the Clerk of Courts position. The Clerks office isn't about serving your family, it's about serving the Winkler and Triantafilou families. Vote Winkler!
Some Guy Named Smith for Congress. Brad Wenstrup defeated Jean Schmidt in March, and now he must pay! We don't know anything about this Smith guy but we want him to win anyways. Avenge Jean Schmidt! Vote Smith.
Leslie Ghiz and Heather Russell for Judge. This race features a choice between 4 lovely ladies competing for 2 spots. Both Ghiz and Russell are great tax-hiking Republicans who stood with us when we supported Hamilton County's $777 Sales Tax Hike. These are the kind of Republicans we must elect.
We also encourage you to support the following candidates:
Connie Pillich for State Representative. We endorsed Pillich 2 years ago and she has done nothing but ratify our support. Connie has been a great disciple of higher taxes, more spending, Section 8 housing in the suburbs, and taking donations from known racists. If Connie loses, Racist State Representative Bob Hagan would have to find someone else to laugh at all his racial slurs.
The candidates running against Lou Terhar and Pat DeWine. We hate Pat DeWine. We have never been shy about telling you how much we hate this guy. This guy has opposed one tax increase after another and we find that completely unacceptable. Lou Terhar is another bad guy who we want to see stopped. We support their liberal opponents, though we don't find either of them relevant enough to merit their own individual paragraph.
The Democratic candidate for Coroner. We can't spell or pronounce her name, but we endorse her. We love her call for a new $50 million crime lab. Surely that would require a tax increase. Her opponent, whose name we also can't spell or pronounce, opposes a new crime lab. We just hope you can find her on the ballot.
Lou Blessing for State Representative. Lou Blessing voted for Bob Taft's Sales Tax hikes. Keep a good thing going. Lou Blessing for State Representative.